You clicked on this because maybe your heart is hurting and you were wondering what to do. Maybe you clicked on this because you thought "oh gosh, what the hell does this idiot know about love?" Either way, I'm glad you clicked around and ended up here. You most likely don't know me and don't particularly care about my opinion, but I'll tell you a little story anyways and tell you what I'm doing to get over it.
Love. Love is a funny word. It's something that either makes you feel on top of the world or at the bottom of the ocean, drowning with no way out. People have different ideas about what love is, and your idea of it is no more wrong or right than mine is. Love means something different to everyone, but for the most part everyone seems to agree that love can't be bought. It's something that either happens or doesn't. It can't be forced or controlled. Love just is. Love is all around us all the time, whether we realize it or not. It can be a loud whirlwind of reckless emotions or a quiet, simple feeling that rests soundly in your heart. It can be the perfect combination of crazy and calm. Sometimes it'll just be perfect.
Every love is special. I love my dog. I love my parents. I love my brothers and my true friends that stick by me. I love to read and play tennis and travel. I love lots of people and things. Everyone loves something. Yet, one day you will click with someone and it won't be like any other love you've felt before. It'll be love; the kind you read about in John Green novels or watch in Nicholas Sparks' movies. It will make you feel so many different things at once that you know it just must be true.
I thought I felt this kind of love. Actually, I know I did, but we are all young and lost and trying to piece together who we are when we stand alone. Adding another person into the equation just complicates everything, sometimes for the better and other times for the worse. Some days you'll lounge around, wrapped in a blanket, eating ice cream, listening to Taylor Swift songs, and watching Titanic and The Notebook. That's just the way it is, but not the way it will always be.
Anyways, I guess I learned a few things about myself and everyone else. I've talked with lots of friends and we share stories and connect over it and it is truly amazing, despite the fact that we've bonded over sad things. Something I will never doubt is the importance of strong friendships. Heartache and difficult times definitely reveal true friends and I am forever grateful for these true friends I have by my side.
I can't tell you how to heal a broken heart, because your heart is not broken. Sometimes the pain may be so extreme it feels like your heart has split in two, but it is still beating and you are breathing and you are alive. You are so alive in fact, that you are capable of feeling so much pain. In a tragic way, it is sort of incredible. You loved so intensely and deeply and that is never something to be ashamed of.
So you can't heal this heart of yours. You have to stop waiting for the pain to end, enjoy life, and let time do its thing. One day before you can think twice you will realize that the pain is over and you were too busy to even notice.
A few things I learned about this love thing through my experiences and the experiences of others are as follows...
1. Never doubt the love you felt and thought you once had. It was real. Your feelings are real and they mattered then and they matter now. Just because it doesn't seem real now doesn't mean it was never real at all.
2. You will feel everything at once and then nothing at all. Sometimes you will be bitter and angry and confused. Other times, you won't even care and you will laugh and forget you were ever sad at all. It's a rocky road and there will always be good days and bad days.
3. Only say what you truly mean. Whether you are in a relationship or not, just be honest. Don't say you love someone if you don't. If you do love someone, tell them. It is pretty simple and will make life and love a lot less complicated.
4. You fight for the people you love. It is that simple. If you truly love someone with your whole heart then you will do anything to love them forever. Love is love and it can't be restrained.
5. There is unconditional love and conditional love. Never settle for conditional love- that's the love that has to be earned or can be ended by any mistake or rough patch. Unconditional love is the type of love your dog has for you, okay? This love is unlike anything in the whole universe. Unconditional love is not saying "I love you" and holding hands. It is not "I love you if you love me" or "I only love you because..." it is just love with no reason at all.
6. There are more hurt people in this world than you realize. Everyone has either had a broken heart, is dealing with one, or will have one in the future. We are all humans and we all feel whether we want to or not.
7. True love never ends. You don't have to see each other ever again or speak another word to one another. It can go from endless "I love you's" each day to complete silence. They can move to Mars. Others will hold your hand and touch your heart. That doesn't matter. What matters is that if it was true once it will always be true, even if it is over. The end of something doesn't mean it was never real in the first place. It happened and for a time in history it was real and it'll always be that way.
8. Accept that sometimes things end before they truly ended. Does that make sense? Sometimes things fade away before it all is officially over. You will feel this drifting apart I'm talking about. If you've been through it, it makes sense. It's like when you're driving and know a stop is coming up, even if you can't see the red light yet. Sometimes there comes a time when you just know it's going to end and that's okay.
9. You are young and have a lot of life left to live. It may be a bit cheesy to say, but it really is true. You have a lot of people to meet in the future and a lot more to do than focus on love. When love is meant to be it will find a way to be.
10. Sometimes it'll feel like timing was just a bitch and the world was against you and nothing ended up the way it was supposed to. Well, I'll promise you this one thing: the way your life is at this exact moment is the way it is supposed to be. It may not feel like it, but one day you'll look back and all the pieces will fit together.
11. You are allowed to be sad, but you are not allowed to stay sad forever. You won't stay sad forever. You may be allowed to be sad, but you deserve to be happy, too.
Love is everywhere. Love is pure, even when it causes us pain. It is complicated and sometimes too difficult to understand but it is the most powerful thing in this world. Love is worth it. Until next time xxx.
No comments:
Post a Comment