The Many Questions of TV and Movies

I'm going to begin by saying that "everything" is simply what we are surrounded by from movies to television shows.  Here is the big shocker... It is all false!  And it actually quite irritates me.  I decided to make a sort of fun post, instead of being analytical or talking about Christmas.  So here it is:

For one, I grew up watching all those fun Disney movies, from the classic princess ones, to the High School Musicals.  I watch all the "hit" shows on television (for teenage girls like myself anyways), and enjoy a romantic flick like anyone else.  I will admit, I still watch all of the Disney ones when I'm having a downer sort of day.  But here is a list of why they are incredibly irrelevant:

First, High School Musical:

1.  In HSM, the "hot, popular" Troy falls in love with the "nerdy and new" Gabriella.  This does not happen in real life.
2.  Everyone begins singing at any given time (hence, musical).  But, I ask, how does everyone know the choreographed dance moves and correct song lyrics?
3.  How do siblings (Sharpay and Ryan, respectively) get along so well to always perform in musicals together and audition with one another?  Siblings never get along that well.
4.  Troy and Gabriella meet at a teenage New Years party.  Yet, everyone is so well behaved it amazes me.  Why can't teenagers just sing karaoke?

5.  The school is gigantic.  Look at it.  It even has a clock.  And is it actually three stories?

6.  At the end of each movie, all the characters act like the best of friends.  Whether you are popular or a geek, it does not matter in the land of HSM.  Another false thing that I so foolishly believed as a child.  I expected to go into high school and see people singing and dancing on the lunch tables (this is yet to occur, I'm still waiting).

Now, onto my Disney princess questions:

1.  How do animals help Snow White do chores?  Who even came up with this idea?  As a kid I expected a bird to fly in my window and make my bed.
2.  All the princesses have wild animals as pets.  Why can I not have a pet polar bear?
3.  The library in the Beast's castle is to die for.  Even as a little girl, I was in love with it.  I am still desperately in need of a library of that magnitude.

What a romantic gift from the Beast to Belle.

It actually exists.

Let it sink into your little brain.

4. All the inanimate objects talk or are alive in Disney movies.  It would be pretty cool to talk to my wardrobe or to have a magic carpet fly me around.
5.  Cinderella is a poor servant and yet a dashing prince falls in love with her.  This is just not logical.
6.  On the flip side, Jasmine is a princess that falls in love with the "street rat" Aladdin.  Also illogical.
7. I wish I could sleep for 100 years like Sleeping Beauty.  Is that too much to ask for?
8.  As a little girl, I once tried singing under water like Ariel.  It ended horribly.  Shouldn't people be able to breathe under water?  Life would be so much easier.
9.  I also can't seem to find a glass slipper anywhere.  Do they not sell these?  I would like a pair.
10.  It would also be pretty interesting if the clouds talk like they do to Simba.  But look, I found this picture of Timon and Pumba so I win:

Overall, Disney movies are just baffling.  I love them, but I wish I could live them out.  Not happening.

(It took me a long while to find a photo without the "new" princess.  So you are welcome.  Here are the classics.)

That is only my problem with Disney.  Let me continue on to a few of my favorite movies... actually, just one because I have no desire to think of all my favorite movies.  So here is my ALL TIME favorite one:

Titanic

1.  Since when does every love story consist of a poor and rich person falling in love?

2.  And on a ship we all know is going to sink?  It is like they are trying to make us cry.

3. Why is Rose's fiancee such a wretched man?  I hate him so much it is unfathomable.

4.  Why did the Titanic have to sink?  It is just too sad, not to mention that it actually happened in real life.

5.  I am confused why Leonardo DiCaprio and Kate Winslet are not yet married.  They are clearly in love: 

6.  THEY COULD HAVE BOTH FIT ON THE DOOR.  WHY DID THEY NOT?  WHY DID HE DIE?

7.  Rose says she will "never let go," right before she lets Jack sink to the bottom of the Atlantic.  So romantic.  Does this make sense?  I get it has a deeper, emotional meaning.  Still.

8.  It's all okay, though.  Because at the end this happens: 

So perfect.  I'm almost about to cry.

I have lots of favorite TV shows.  A few are: Pretty Little Liars, Glee, and Gossip Girl (I had to narrow the list down).

So for PLL:

1. Why do the producers insist on throwing in a plot twist every 10 seconds?

2.  How do the four little liars have such a fabulous wardrobe?  I am beyond jealous.

Especially Spencer.

I.  Want.  Spencer's.  Closet.  

3.  How are the girls always involved in these murderous mysteries and their parents never find out?  

4.  Why are the police so messed up in Rosewood?  Should I be concerned?

5.  So is Allison alive or what?  

6.  And if not, who killed her?

7.  That is really all I want to know.  

8.  Oh, and who killed Ian?  And Garrett, Maya, Wilden... uh, way too many people are dying.  Shouldn't the townsfolk be more worried?

9.  Who is smart enough to be "A"?

10.  Basically, the show is too confusing.  I have too many questions.

Next, Glee.  First, I'm starting off by saying that Cory's death was absolutely devastating.

1.  How are there so many talented people in one small school?

2.  Can Sue Sylvester be a real person?  I find her terribly amusing.

3.  Why does my school not have a glee club?  Does it?....

4.  It is a shame Rachel and Finn broke up.  Why?  Literally, my heart broke.  Finchel was perfect. 

5.  How come McKinley High School is not my school?

6.  Also, how is it possible for the popular kids, weird kids, smart kids, and dumb kids to all form such a tight bond over their love of music?  I wish this actually happened.

7.  I'm a proud Glee fan.  Yes, I am.

Lastly, Gossip Girl.

"And who am I?  That's a secret I'll never tell.  You know you love me.  Xoxo, Gossip Girl."  My absolute favorite lines to the opening of any TV show.  But throughout watching the series, I had many questions.

1.  Why is it so easy to hate Little J?  Honestly, I just love hating Jenny.

2.  How come I do not have Blair's wardrobe?  

3.  Serena does not have very high morals.  And Dan?  Out of all the Upper East Siders, why pick Dan? (I do not like Humphreys).

4.  Does someone like Chuck actually exist somewhere out in the world?  He better.

5.  They all have such fancy last names.  Waldorf, Van der Woodsen, Archibald, Bass... and Humphrey.  Why is my last name not fancy?

6.  How rich do I have to be to live on the Upper East Side?  And attend Constance Billiards?

7.  Can Dorota be my maid?  She is my favorite person.

8.  Why is Gossip Girl so creepy?  Honestly, who has this sort of time on their hands? (Obviously, me. Look how long this post is).

9.  I should be able to jet off to Paris for the summer and meet a dashing prince (who actually turns out to not be so dashing).  Why can I not do this?

10.  Why are the people in my town and school not as classy as the Upper East Siders?

11.  But really, how much would it cost me to live on the Upper East Side?

I hope you enjoyed this collection of typical teenage TV shows, a romantic movie, and a range of Disney.  I sure did, but I really should get on that homework now.  If you have not seen any of these shows or movies, I suggest you do.  They really are gold.  I promise to have a more significant post tomorrow.  Until next time xxx.